by questful | Jul 28, 2020 | Financial, Uncategorized
Moving home is a significant undertaking at any time, but when you are also going through a divorce there can be some additional issues to consider. Many couples will need to sell property during a divorce so it is important to think about how you will manage this process. You should also ensure that you get all the support you need, not only from your divorce lawyer, but also through selecting a trustworthy and experienced realtor and appraiser to value and sell your property.
Should You Sell Your Home When You Get Divorced?
Dividing up your assets is a key part of arranging a divorce. Since the marital home is usually the largest asset that you share, it is essential to think carefully about what will happen to it when you separate. Putting the property on the market is the most common option for divorcing couples in Colorado, but it isn’t always the right choice for every couple and you shouldn’t feel pressured to rush into a quick sale. Selling a home for the right price can take time and properties in many parts of Colorado are in high demand so there is no need to rush to find a buyer.
Most couples who are divorcing in Colorado will decide to sell their home and then split the proceeds. However, there are other options that you may want to consider. For example, one partner may be able to refinance the mortgage and buy out the other. You might also want to delay the sale, for example if want to keep the family home for a while in order to provide continuity for your children. The best option for you will depend on your personal and financial circumstances, so it is important not to rush into your decision.
You may also want to consider the local real estate market before deciding on the best time to sell. Take a look at the listings for similar properties and talk to a realtor to get an idea of how quickly you will be able to find a buyer. Get your property valued so that you know how much it would take to buy out your partner or how much you could each make if you sell now. You might decide that it is better to wait a while before selling, to rent out the property temporarily, or to make some improvements in order to raise its value.
When you are ready to sell your home, you should consider how you are going to manage the process while separating. Although your realtor will be able to help, there are some decisions that you will need to take together. You may prefer to do this in person or through an intermediary, such as your divorce lawyers or another neutral party. You can get advice on the process from your lawyers or a realtor who has experience managing property sales during a divorce.
Preparing to Sell Your Home
The basic process of selling your home during a divorce will be the same as at any other time. You will need to choose a realtor, have your home valued, arrange showings, and decide what to do when you get an offer. However, since you will be in the process of separating while all of this is going on, it is important to communicate with each other (directly or via your lawyers) and to make the important decisions early on.
One of the key issues that you will need to discuss is the price you are willing to accept for the property. Getting the property valued by a realtor will give you a good idea of how much you should expect to make. Your divorce settlement will determine how the proceeds from the sale will be shared between you and you can ask your lawyer for advice on this.
The valuation is a guide to how much your property is worth, but you will still need to consider what you will do if a potential buyer makes an offer on your home. You will both need to agree on how low you are willing to go if an offer below the asking price is made. Deciding this before you put the property on the market will enable you to negotiate more easily with the buyer when you receive an offer as you won’t need to take more time to discuss it between yourselves. Accepting a lower offer can help you to achieve a quicker sale, but it could also impact your budget for buying your next home so it is important to consider this decision carefully.
Another issue that you will need to decide on before you put the property up for sale is how you will manage the process. You will have various tasks to complete in order to find a buyer and arrange the sale. Depending on your circumstances, you may want to divide these tasks between you or for one of you to take on responsibility for the entire process. Among the tasks that you may need to complete are:
- Preparing the property for sale (e.g. conducting repair work, touching up the decor)
- Choosing a realtor and arranging the valuation
- Setting up viewings or open houses
- Negotiating with buyers who make offers on the property (via your realtor)
- Arranging removals and ending contracts for utilities etc when you move out
Once you have a better idea of everything that needs to be done, it can also be a good idea to talk about the likely timeline for the sale. Your realtor can advise you on how long it usually takes for similar properties to sell in your area, but you may also need to consider factors such as your children’s schooling or how long it might take you both to find new homes to move into. If one or both of you are still living in the property, then you will need to take this into account when arranging viewings or setting the completion date for the sale.
Although it is impossible to set a definite timeline for the sale of your property, it can be helpful to have some idea of the timescale. You can set targets for accomplishing some tasks, such as arranging any repairs that need to be done or getting your house listed by a realtor. Doing this can help you both to make plans for your futures.
Buying a New Home After a Divorce
In addition to managing the sale of your shared property, you will each need to think about your next steps. You may want to buy your own property, so you will need to look for a new home at the same time as you are selling. You will need to consider two key points while you are searching for property to buy if you intend to use the proceeds from selling your marital home.
Firstly, you should work out how much your shared property is likely to sell for and how much your share of the proceeds will be as this is likely to determine your budget for the purchase. You will also need to take a careful look at your credit rating and finances in order to set your budget. It is a good idea to talk to a bank or mortgage lender early on so that you have a reliable estimate of how much you will be able to borrow. You can then ask your realtor for advice on your property search.
Secondly, you will need to consider what impact the sale of your shared home could have on the timing of your purchase or move. You may need to move into temporary accommodation if you get a good offer for your current property before you have a new home to move into. Alternatively, you may need to wait to complete the sale on your shared property until you or your ex-partner is ready to move out.
The realtor who is managing the sale of your shared property will also be able to advise you on your property search and to guide you through the process of buying a new home.
Starting the Sales Process
If you are in the process of divorcing, then you can contact a realtor to learn more about your options or to take the first steps towards selling your marital home. It is important to get all the facts so that you can make the right decisions about when to sell. You will also need to get the property valued so that you both know how much you are likely to receive for the sale, especially if you will be using the proceeds to purchase your next home.
The process of selling your home during a divorce will be very similar to any other property sale, but your personal circumstances mean that it is essential to communicate well and to coordinate your efforts. Discussing the property value and timeline with your ex-partner at the beginning of the process will ensure that you both have realistic expectations. You may also need to divide responsibility for various aspects of the sale between yourselves, although your realtor will be able to manage much of the process on your behalf.
Selling your home is a major life-experience, whether you are going through a divorce or not. Having a reliable realtor who knows the local property market well can make all the difference. If you need any guidance on selling your joint property or you want to arrange a valuation of your home, then you should get in touch right away.
Damon Chavez, Realtor
10135 West San Juan Way, #100
Littleton, CO 80127
Phone: (303) 649-6767
damon@coloradohousefinders.com
www.coloradohousefinders.com
by questful | Oct 23, 2019 | Parenting, Uncategorized
Parents who are experiencing divorce, separation or a breakup will need to develop a formal parenting plan. One of the most important components of a thorough, useful and enforceable parenting plan is a parenting time schedule that considers your family’s needs and places the child(ren)’s best interests at the forefront. Sufficient time and thought should be devoted to the parenting schedule to help ensure a good fit.
The Colorado legislature has found that “in most circumstances, it is in the best interest of all parties to encourage frequent and continuing contact between each parent and the minor children of the marriage after the parents have separated or dissolved their marriage.”[1]
The foundation of a parenting time schedule is typically referred to as “regular parenting time.” There are a myriad of different parenting time schedules to consider depending upon the percentage of parenting time that each parent will exercise. Below are a few of the most common parenting schedules. In the examples below Parent A = Green, and Parent B = Red.
Equally shared (50/50) plans:
5-2-2-5 Plan
| Monday |
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3-3-4-4 Plan
| Sunday |
Monday |
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| Sunday |
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| Sunday |
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| Sunday |
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3-4-4-3 Plan
| Sunday |
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Wednesday |
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Saturday |
| Sunday |
Monday |
Tuesday |
Wednesday |
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Friday |
Saturday |
| Sunday |
Monday |
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| Sunday |
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Week-on/Week-off Plan
| Sunday |
Monday |
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| Sunday |
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| Sunday |
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Approximately 60/40 Parenting Plans:
4-3 Plan (156 overnights per year to Parent B)
| Sunday |
Monday |
Tuesday |
Wednesday |
Thursday |
Friday |
Saturday |
| Sunday |
Monday |
Tuesday |
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Friday |
Saturday |
Alternating weekends with mid-week overnight (130 overnights per year to Parent B)
| Sunday |
Monday |
Tuesday |
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| Sunday |
Monday |
Tuesday |
Wednesday |
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Friday |
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| Sunday |
Monday |
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| Sunday |
Monday |
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80/20 Parenting Plan:
| Sunday |
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| Sunday |
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| Sunday |
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| Sunday |
Monday |
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In choosing the best plan for your family you should consider: both parents’ work schedules, proximity of both parents’ homes to each other and to the child(ren)’s school and activities, the age(s) of the child(ren), and the child(ren)’s needs with respect to frequency of contact and frequency of transitions.
Generally, it is the best practice to include as much detail as possible in your parenting plan, including specific and consistent transition times and locations, identifying which parent is responsible for the child(ren)’s transportation, and defining methods of communication. Parents may agree to deviate from the plan from time to time; but having a well-written plan to fall back on is critical when disputes arise.
In addition to the regular parenting time schedule, parents should design a holiday schedule to include all important religious and secular holidays, birthdays, and school breaks. There is no universal holiday schedule that will fit every family; thus, it is important to ensure that your parenting schedule reflects your family’s individual practices and traditions.
A well-designed and comprehensive parenting plan will provide direction, consistency and predictability for both parents and their child(ren). If you need assistance with drafting a parenting plan that best fits your family’s needs, you should consult with a competent family law attorney.
Nicole Hanson
Hanson Law Firm, LLC
44 Cook St., Ste. 100 | Denver, CO 80206
Ph: 303.459.2393
www.nhansonlaw.com
by questful | Oct 22, 2019 | Parenting, Uncategorized
The words to Graham Nash’s song from the 60s still ring true. The sentimental message of this song is a perfect touchstone for those of you who are trying to navigate the emotionally rocky waters which surround holiday parenting time. It can be challenging to manage shared parenting time during the holidays. It is even more difficult for those families with geographical and distance issues, blended families, and raw wounds of recent partings.
Opportunity
With challenges come opportunities. The opportunity is open to you to use the holidays as a time to “teach your children well” by role modeling positive interactions, kindness, and respect. October is a good time of year to think ahead and begin planning. Parents can try to keep the holidays a happy time for their children by avoiding conflicts. They can also work together to create schedules centered on their children.
Traditions
Parents can also work separately to create meaningful new traditions in their own households. Part of the pain when a relationship ends is the loss of certain holiday traditions. Remember that your children are experiencing this loss too. New traditions can be created. However, you do not want these new traditions to be based in conflict and anger.
Change is Hard
None of this is easy. There may be new partners, step-families, many more schedules to coordinate, etc. That is why having a touchstone, “teach your children well,” may help you stay grounded. The lessons your children glean from the cooperation and selflessness shown by parents will last them a lifetime.
Joy
Later in the same song Nash goes on to acknowledge that children provide teaching moments for their parents. Think back to how many wonderful moments of pure joy your children have already given you. You have been able to rediscover the joys of the holidays through their eyes. Now, during this time of transition and building new traditions, you have choices to make. Will you support and nurture them? Or will you add to their burdens? Holidays can be wonderful occasions or they can be fraught with pain and tension. Only the two of you can decide.
Conclusion
As the holidays approach each year, you can choose, again, to teach your children well. “So just look at them and sigh and know they love you.” Let this focus help you to leave them with the best blessing you can ever give them: your example of cooperation and love as you create a schedule that puts them first.
David S. Rolfe
Attorney/Mediator
David S. Rolfe, L.L.C.
Off: 303-841-1181
by questful | Sep 25, 2019 | Collaborative Law, Emotional, Uncategorized
In our day-to-day lives, we encounter all types of personalities. Some are much easier to deal with than others. And too often, we don’t get to choose the players in our divorce cases, so we must learn how to work with others in an effective, respectful manner in order to get things done.
The key is to develop an array of communication skills so that we’re prepared for the different people, personality styles, and situations that come our way. Teams depend on quick communications internally with colleagues as well as externally with clients in a variety of different mediums: phone calls, email, texts, meetings, etc.
In a perfect world, every communication exchange is efficient and to the point. Divorce cases are made up of diverse people with different temperaments—from those who are calm, cool and collected to High-Conflict People (HCP)—all of whom have varying levels of communication skills and motives. Toss in a couple disruptive people, whether they are clients or colleagues, and the probability of depleting productivity and morale is high.
Most every divorcing couple is in conflict, by definition. And many of them are high-conflict individuals by nature which only exacerbates the situation.
Do these examples sound familiar?
- Perhaps you dread reading the daily complaints in your inbox from your soon-to-be ex-spouse?
- Have you ever received an irate email from a client, blaming you for their dissatisfaction and threatening to sue?
- Do those written reviews from your High-Conflict clients just make you want to quit?
- Having trouble collaborating on a divorce case with that certain person who never seems to actually work, and blames others for not getting things done?
- Maybe you have a client who sends you countless antagonistic emails and consumes far more time than you can give to any one client.
- Are you irritated with Karen and Bob’s never-ending series of aggressive emails to each other, all of which get copied to you?
These are just a few of the situations where you might find a High-Conflict Person or be an HCP’s target of blame. Chances are it’s happened before and it will happen again. Do you and your teammates know how to respond?
BIFF Responses, from a valuable book by Bill Eddy entitled Biff: Quick Responses to High Conflict People, Their Personal Attacks, Hostile Email and Social Media Meltdowns, are specifically designed to help you address written hostilities, but this technique can also be used in person-to-person verbal confrontations.
BIFF stands for Brief, Informative, Friendly, and Firm. It’s a simple response technique that’s quick and effective in dealing with today’s High-Conflict communications. I’ve used BIFF responses with great success in both my personal and professional lives, but they take practice!
BRIEF
Responses should be very short: one paragraph of 2-5 sentences in most cases. The point is to avoid triggering HCP defensiveness in the other person and focusing them on problem-solving information. The more you say, the more likely you are to trigger another negative response.
INFORMATIVE
Provide a sentence or two of straight, useful information in neutral terms on the subject being discussed. Shift the discussion to an objective subject rather than opinions about one another.
FRIENDLY
You can start out by saying something like: “Thank you for telling me your opinion on this subject.” Or: “I appreciate your concerns.” Or: “Thanks for your email. Let me give you some information you may not have…”
FIRM
The goal of many BIFF responses is to end the conversation—to disengage from a potentially high-conflict situation. You want to let the other person know that this is really all you are going to say on the subject. In some cases, you will give two clear choices for future action. If you need a response, then it often helps to set a firm reply date. If you are going to take action if the other person does not do something, then you could say, for example: “If I don’t receive the information I need by such and such date, then I will have to do such and such. I really hope that won’t be necessary.” (Note this is both firm and friendly)
What’s the Goal?
There are usually three goals to consider with HCPs:
- To manage the relationship, such as when you work with the person, when this person is your child, or is a spouse with whom you’re negotiating a settlement, etc. In other words, when the relationship is important to you OR you have no way to get out of it.
- To reduce the relationship to a less intense level, such as with a friend, neighbor, or even a family member.
- To end the relationship, usually by phasing the person slowly out of your life.
How you respond makes a big difference to the HCP. If you give him negative feedback, you will increase the intensity of his interactions with you, as HCPs can’t handle negative feedback. It’s better to use BIFFs and avoid talking about the past as well as putting the emphasis on the desired future behavior.
I’ve used the BIFF technique in countless situations: defusing team disagreements, getting business partners (and married couples) unstuck from their defensiveness and deal breakers, keeping mediation and negotiation sessions on track and moving forward, breaking up family arguments that no one thought could ever be resolved, etc. These tools will help prevent defensiveness, defuse arguments and create connections with teammates as well as family and friends. Truly a must-have for your skills toolbox!
Deb Daufeldt, MA, MBA, LPC, NCC, PMP
Office Phone: (303) 662-1888
Mobile Phone: (303) 638-5295
deb@newchaptersolutions.com
www.newchaptersolutions.com
by questful | Sep 8, 2019 | Financial, Uncategorized
When dividing assets in divorce most people, individuals, mediators and attorneys alike, tend to focus on the property division spreadsheet. Current asset and debt values from statements are deemed to be separate or marital and funneled onto the division worksheet. Typically, above all else, the focus and end goal is to split property 50-50. With so much emphasis on this spreadsheet that dictates the remainder of your financial future, is there anything missing that could dramatically skew the end results?
The old cliché of ‘nothing is certain in life except death and taxes’ rings loud and true in divorce, don’t ignore them. It is important to realize that the value of an asset can drastically morph, being cut in half or double in value depending upon when the funds are needed. Retirement accounts have tax benefits and may be invested more aggressively allowing funds to grow faster over a long period of time. Money doubles every 10 years if invested at a rate of 7.2% per year. However, if investments are needed to purchase a new home, pay legal fees or subsidize an individual’s life style, the amount of money available after-tax could potentially be cut in half.
Different tax rules need to be applied to different types of accounts. For example, annuities versus stock accounts have different tax rules. Roth accounts versus IRA or 401k accounts are significantly different and should be analyzed. Additional withdrawal expenses such as surrender fees may be applicable to some accounts or penalty waivers available in other scenarios.
There is a tremendous value in taking the time to sit down with a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst™ to support you in making informed decisions during your divorce regarding your future.
Amy Mahlen, CFP®, CDFA®
AM Financial
7887 East Belleview Ave., Suite 100
Denver, CO 80111
Phone: (303) 875-8730
amahlen@mahlenfinancial.com
www.mahlenfinancial.com
